Day 86: Writing and Felted Bird Clippies
“One’s pain is one’s own creation. One should treat such things as if they are wind behind one’s ear. In other words, just brush them aside.”
Pain. Emotional pain. It reminds me of when I was a child, sitting in the doctor’s office, waiting for a shot. Usually, I would be writhing in pain, long before the needle even touched my skin.
I remember my mother telling me, “just don’t look at it, Diana. It hurts less that way.”
I think pain is something that doesn’t have to be. I mean, situations occur that make us feel pain, because of our expectations.
I expected my mother to be someone she is not, so I incurred pain. It’s no one’s fault. My mother is who she is. I have learned now to live with that, and move on.
People do wrong things all the time. Things that hurt us. It happens.
I was just telling my niece that their comes a point when we just have to choose to move on. That is just how life works. We must move on, or become victims once again.
I choose though, not to be a victim. When I gave birth to my daughter, I realized what an amazing gift I was given by being able to be her mother. I want to lead by example. I want to be the things that I wanted in a mother.
My daughter deserves the best. I love her. And I want to make sure that she knows how far I’ve come. I have come a long way indeed. Unlike most of my cousins, I choose to acknowledge what happened to me as a child. I choose to see that yes, damage was done. I am not going to just pull the wool over my eyes, and make it seem like nothing happened. But you know what? I choose gratitude and compassion over anger and bitterness. It just feels nice going down. And then my daughter can be proud of me, for coming the long, winding road that I’ve walked down.
So for today’s crafty endeavor, I really didn’t do much. I haven’t been too inspired to make art, I’ve more been inspired to write.
I worked on a proposal for a book I hope to publish, and worked on some more needle felting.
I did just get inspired to make some tags though, so I’ll definitely work on those tomorrow.
I turned the birdies from yesterday into clippies today.